Birth Story - Part One

Who washes their hair, shaves their legs and paints their toenails after their water has broken, when they really should be heading to the hospital? Oh, that’s right. I do.

But let me back up first…

It was mid-January 2012 in Clarksville, TN and I was 38 weeks pregnant, still moving around, hitting the gym, walking the dog and getting stuff done as if I weren’t even pregnant, all in preparation for our first daughter to be born. Unfortunately, I was doing all of the nesting alone, as my other [and better] half is in Afghanistan serving our country [instead of serving me breakfast in bed. The nerve!]
During my 36 week appointment on January 3rd, I got a huge shock to my system when I was told I was measuring almost 5 weeks ahead. An ultrasound reassured me that I wasn’t a month off but that our little one was a bit big. Unlike most pregnant women, I was not in any rush for this little girl to come out. With Justin at a remote base temporarily, he had no access to Skype and little access to a telephone and I wanted him to be able to participate in the birth as much as possible. So I was staying away from everything known to induce labor…spicy food, red wine, balsamic vinegar, you name it. I also laid off the gym, which was very hard to do! Given my family history [my mom was three and a half weeks late with me], I was pretty sure she was going to come late. So sure, in fact, that I booked my mom’s flight to come out to Tennessee just three days before my due date. What can I say? I'm a gambler.

Also, because I was so sure I was not going to be delivering anytime soon, I procrastinated doing all my pre-admission paperwork and getting my name changed on my military ID to reflect my husband’s last name, not my maiden name. [We got my military ID before I did all the name change stuff so that I could get on and off base without my husband {read: he wouldn’t have to go to the commissary anymore} so it’s had my maiden name on it. I had the fullest intentions to get it changed before now, really I did. But there were many more important things to do, like watch Real Housewives and shop online.]

I took a lot of comfort in the fact that I was still not experiencing any Braxton Hicks contractions, I didn’t feel a super-full-speed nesting urge kick in, there was no sign of a mucus plug being lost and people were telling me I was still carrying high and she hadn’t dropped yet. Sweet. I had my 37 week appointment on Tuesday, January 17th and stopped in to say hello to everyone in Justin’s Clinic. They all noticed I had indeed grown since they saw me before Christmas but agreed with me that she was still flying high in the sky. Their medical opinions sealed the deal - we were staying put for a few more weeks.

I woke up on the morning of Friday, January 20th and looked in the mirror as I passed to make my way to my second home, the bathroom. Whoa…she totally grew overnight! I snapped a quick picture of my belly to email to my husband then went to pee for what would probably be the first of 27 occurrences that day.January 20 - 8am

For comparison, here I am just three days earlier...

I saw via Twitter that Courtney was watching Stephen Colbert on Morning Joe so I turned it on to start my morning off with a barrel of laughs, while texting Court throughout.

I called Justin’s Grandma to update her and left a voicemail sharing my confidence that the first member of our next generation wasn’t arriving anytime soon. (I also made a mental note to text Justin’s parents and also tell them I was in good shape but never got around to it that day.) I then went to the commissary to stock up on some groceries but was extremely pissed off when I realized I had left the majority of my freshly printed and cut coupons at home on the desk. “But that’s ok…I guess I’ll come back later this afternoon or tomorrow morning.”

After getting the groceries put away and spending some time doing little things around the house, I relaxed in the glider in the nursery and had a catch up phone call with Lindsey. We talked all about the pregnancy and how we couldn’t believe I was almost done. I’ve been very honest with people about how easy my pregnancy had been and this conversation was no different. I bragged about my lack of waddling, feet swelling, stretch marks and heartburn but did confide in her that I had been struck by one pregnancy demon in the last few days: WRETCHED gas. She’s a BFF so it’s okay to share that kinda stuff with her. We talked about Lindsey’s plans for the weekend (she had none) but I again relayed my confidence in the fact that Adrienne wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. This was important for her to know since, being 4.5 hours away in Atlanta, Lindsey was my emergency contact should I happen to go in labor before my mom was here. The first thing I was supposed to do was call Lindsey so she could hit the road and be here for me. But that didn’t matter because, AGAIN, Adrienne wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. We got off the phone when I realized the sun was going down and I still needed to take my sweet puppster on a walk. I nixed the idea of going back to the store out of sheer laziness. Looking back, I do remember feeling a teensy, and I mean TEENSY, tinge of nausea when I started up the car. I'm also pretty sure I remember thinking “They say you get nauseous before labor. I need to remember that…”

I bundled up and took Lily to a little elementary school down the street to let her roam, sniff and do her bidness. It was my 2nd to last Friday alone EVER since my mom would be arriving next Saturday so I decided to stop at the Dollar General for some candy on the way home. (I had cleared the house of ALL sweets since the weeks before had brought on some chocolate massacres that I was extremely ashamed of.) Our walk was uneventful and I noted how good I felt. Some walks in the previous months had led to a small bit of muscle discomfort since the puppster sometimes likes to walk a little fast. We walked around for almost 45 minutes and then made our way to Dollar General.

I pulled into the parking lot and reached over to grab my wallet out of my purse in the floorboard. I sat back up and turned off the ignition and then, at 6:55, I felt it.

Holy crap. I just peed in my pants!

I didn’t know what to do…I REALLY wanted some candy so I contemplated how I could maneuver this without being known as “Pregnant Pee Pants Girl” around town. I was wearing black leggings so it wouldn’t really show…but was my jacket long enough? I decided it wasn’t and my vanity trumped my craving. I guess I would just have to pour some chocolate syrup down my throat and call it a day. Humph. My heart was racing a bit but not once did the thought of my water breaking cross my mind at this point.

I made the 2 minute drive home and as I got closer to the house, I felt the urge to pee more. I held it in (barely) but when the garage door shut, I tore out of the car faster than ever and made a beeline for the bathroom. As I stopped to turn off the alarm, I felt the wet spot on my leggings spread even further down my legs and a huge gush of water went into the toilet right as I sat down. This was humiliating. I took off my leggings and went to clean up some trickles that had landed on the floor. There was a pair of cotton pants hanging over the back of the couch so I put them on and sat down on the couch next to Lily, feeling dejected. And three years old. Then it happened again.

WHY COULDN’T I FEEL THE URGE TO PEE?!?!?! I ran to the bathroom and as I was peeing, started Googling my butt off. “Bladder control third trimester”, “I can’t feel the urge to pee while pregnant”, etc. etc. etc. My jaw dropped as I realized I was the victim of the bitch named Karma. I had bragged to Lindsey about how easy and joyous this pregnancy was and here I was, 38 weeks pregnant, and would have to wear a diaper for the remainder of my pregnancy. Tons of thoughts went through my head…”I have a TON of stuff to return to Target tomorrow and I have to go back to the commissary! I can’t do that if I’m peeing all over the place!” “Should I call Courtney and see if she went through this?!” And finally, “Hmm…I wonder if this is my water breaking.”

It couldn’t be. This was a TON of fluid and I was habitually drinking over a hundred ounces of water a day. I decided to do my own experiment and stop drinking water for the next couple hours and see if it continued to happen.

Feeling all “pee-y” I headed upstairs to take a shower and sulk and mourn the loss of my carefree pregnancy since I would be strapped to the John for the next couple weeks. Lily followed and I noticed she had a bit of a concerned look on her face. She had been attached to me at the hip for the past couple days and I think she knew something was definitely up. I had to stop off at the toilet again before making my way into the shower. I got out and threw on some comfy pants and one of my husband’s sweaters and headed downstairs to watch TV. I had planned on having a yummy dinner of Annie’s White Cheddar Shells that I had mixed with Brussels Sprouts and Turkey Sausage but I had no appetite.

When I felt leakage for about the 7th time, I decided to pick up the phone and call my mom. It was around 7:10 when I made the call and as soon as she answered the phone I said, “Okay…don’t freak out…I’m either leaking urine or my water just broke.” She stayed surprisingly calm as did I. I told her I wasn’t sure what was going on and asked if there was any way she could go ahead and come tomorrow morning instead of next Saturday. She said absolutely and I tasked her with communicating with Southwest to change her flight while I called Courtney to get her thoughts. If need be, I would call the hospital as well to see what they told me to do.
We got off the phone with our to-do lists and I then immediately emailed Justin:

From: Shelby Fri, Jan 20, 2012 at 7:19 PM
To: Justin

Subject: Can you call me please?!
I'm okay...but some things are starting to happen and I would like to speak with you! I've changed my mom's flight to come in tomorrow morning instead of next weekend. I'm leaking some stuff and I don't know if it's urine or amniotic fluid but I'm going to go in tonight to get checked. I’m holding off on calling your parents since it’s late and I don’t want to worry them if it’s nothing. I don't think that's completely necessary at this point. I'm going to have Anna and Jeff look after Lily and Shoshanna is the backup.

I'll keep you posted...I love you so much!!!

xoxo
Shelby


I then called Courtney, who I knew was on her way to D.C. for her first overnight without Evelyn. I think she heard the calm panic in my voice and immediately asked, “Are you in labor?” I risked sounding like a paranoid first time mom but responded, "I think so!” I explained what had happened and she said to call the hospital and get their opinion and call her back. I really couldn’t believe this was all happening. Was I really calling the hospital? Could this little girl really be coming early? I picked up the phone and told the story a third time, this time to the L&D Advice Nurse at Blanchfield. Her instructions were to put on a pad and if I saturated the pad in 30 minutes to come in and get checked out.

Thirty minutes? That sucker would be filled in five! I called my mom back and told her I was going to head to the hospital, just to be safe. Her flight was switched and she would now be arriving the next morning around 9:30am. She asked if I was going to call Lindsey and get her to head out here but I wanted to wait until I knew for sure. I would hate to have her drive all the way here for nothing on a Friday night. I gave Courtney the same update I gave my mom and she kept expressing her excitement for me. I promised to keep her in the loop as much as possible and we hung up the phone.

I then looked around my house and got a bit stressed. Tomorrow, Saturday, was going to be my final “cleaning and nesting day” and the house definitely needed it. I decided that since I wasn’t feeling any contractions or pressure or anything else that would make me feel like it was urgent to get to the hospital, I would take 20 minutes to straighten up as much as I could. If this was the real deal, this place was in no condition to welcome a newborn!

I went full speed ahead – emptying the dishwasher, wiping the counters, sweeping the floor, putting away laundry and cleaning the toilets. Once I was satisfied with how the house looked, I glanced in the mirror at my 4-days since last washed hair, a face that was in dire need of exfoliating, legs begging for a shave and toenails screaming for some polish. I was definitely in no condition to welcome a newborn!

I decided that since I was still feeling no pain and there was no sign of blood or anything, I would be safe to shower and get myself ready. At this point, I called and notified my neighbor across the street, Shoshanna, that I was feeling some laborish symptoms. Her excitement was hard to hide and she immediately offered her assistance in getting me ready. I told her I was good but I would need her help with Lily that evening and the next morning possibly. She couldn’t believe how calm I was and was even more shocked that I was going to take a shower and get ready! I told her I would call her when I was ready to go so I could give her the tour and info on Lily. At this point, Courtney called and asked if I was on the road to the hospital yet.

“Um no…I’m getting ready to take a shower.”

“Okay well take a quick one. And get. to. the. hospital.”

She also asked if I had called Lindsey. No, I hadn't. Because I wasn't. in. labor.

I showered and started putting myself together. As I was bustling around the bathroom and bedroom, I also added finishing touches to my overnight bag and Adrienne’s bag. Thankfully our bags were about 80% packed so there wasn’t much I needed to add.

As I was blow drying my hair, my phone rang again. This time it was Lindsey.

“Ummm…what are you doing?”

Dammit Courtney! I knew immediately that she knew. I told Lindsey I was getting ready to go get checked at the hospital and she said, “And what were you supposed to do if and when you had to head to the hospital early?” I told her I didn’t want her driving all the way for nothing but she said that was the point! If I were in labor she didn’t want me to be alone. I promised her I would call her on the way to the hospital and we would discuss if/when she should get on the road.

I tried to continue getting ready but my neighbor Shoshanna called again to check on me. I assured her I was fine but needed this time to myself. Hopefully, she’d get the hint and let me finish getting ready in peace. (Foreshadowing: she didn’t.)
While I was getting ready, I loved on little puppster Lily, knowing this would be the last time she’d have my full attention. I knew she was going to be scared and confused since her Dad was already gone. Now I’d be leaving her too!

My goal was to leave the house at 9pm. A few minutes before 9, I put the finishing touches on myself, grabbed my bags and headed downstairs to load up the car. (For my memory’s sake, I was wearing Citizens of Humanity “Kelly” Maternity jeans, a purple long sleeve top from Motherhood and my tan Revas.) I greeted my neighbor outside and brought her in to give her instructions for the dog, alarm, etc. I made a PB&J sandwich and threw a banana and coconut water in my bag since I had no idea when I’d be eating next. I kissed my sweet doggie goodbye and said adios to what could be a babyless house. I got in the car, got ready to drive away and…CRAP! I forgot the carseat. (Totally wasn’t installed yet…truth be told there is a fire station on the way to the hospital so my plan all along had been, “Hey, I can just stop off on the way!” But now that it was the real deal, it wasn’t happening.) Ran inside, grabbed the carrier and carseat base and threw them, literally, in the backseat.

And with the close of the garage door, I was on my way.

I talked to Lindsey on the way there and we got a game plan together. We both kinda knew I wouldn’t be heading home that night so she told me she was going to go ahead and pack her bags and hit the road. I also called Courtney and gave her the update that I had in fact put down the straightener and was on the way to the hospital. Both were SO excited for me!

The hospital is just an 8 minute drive away, door to door, but as luck would have it, it started pouring rain as soon as I pulled into the parking lot. Great. Because that’s just what a 9-months pregnant and in labor woman with two leather bags and leather shoes needs.

I headed up to L&D on the 3rd Floor and checked in with the front desk. They had me wait in the waiting area for a few minutes. While there, I eavesdropped on a couple family members who had been waiting for a few hours. Whomever they were waiting on had just started to push. They called my name and I was taken back to a triage area and this is where I met one of my favorite midwives of the weekend, Leigh. She had me drop trou, and then hooked my belly up to a couple monitors. I could hear another couple on the other side of the curtain being given the “close, but no cigar” diagnosis. She was 3cm dilated but her water hadn’t broken yet so they were being sent home.

Leigh checked me out and confirmed that I, too, was 3cm dilated but because my water had indeed broken, I wasn’t going anywhere. They told me I would have to wait a few minutes I had to wait a few minutes before being taken to my delivery room because the wing was full. (A huge unit had returned from Afghanistan about 10months ago and thus a huge baby boom began. I was told they were very close to shutting down and diverting patients to the nearby city hospital, Gateway.) Leigh left my curtained off area and went to begin paperwork [my pre-admission paperwork I never got around to. Oops!]

I lay there kinda pinching myself, not really believing this was all about to happen. And then they came…the tears.

Holy shit. I was about to have a baby. And I was alone. And terrified!

Yeahhhh....

It's been over a month since my last update.

Did I call it or what?

In all seriousness, I had the absolute best intentions of returning to blogging but that seemed difficult to manage when my 5-week old daughter decided to accelerate her Baby Bulimia* and drop back down to her birth weight so that she could still fit into her cute Newborn Size Cupcake Onesie for a lil while longer.

Balancing 2-hour feedings round the clock while pumping (because she was only taking pumped milk so that we could know exactly how much she was taking in) plus sterilizing everything for 20 minutes (because, of course, the thrush decided to return again) plus remembering to feed myself and the dog plus keeping a freaked out Pediatrician father up-to-date in Afghanistan didn't exactly leave tons of time for blogging.

But a visit this past weekend from my dear friend, Accelerated Mom got me rejuvenated again since I realize the Pregnancy Brain has now turned into Mommy Brain and I'm slowly but surely forgetting all the details I want to remember. So I'm gonna keep on truckin!

Still to come [slash FINISH slash BEGIN...]
- The longest, most detailed birth story known to mankind (not gross-y detailed, more like "I was wearing my Royal Tan Revas with my COH maternity jeans and carrying a Makers Mark umbrella when I walked in the hospital and greeted the security guard named Tom" detailed...)
- One Month and Two Month Updates
- A special visit from a special person alllll the way from a land of lots of sand!
- Spit up. Lots and lots of spit up.

While you wait, a picture that makes my neck hurt just to look at it.

*I know bulimia is something to be taken seriously. I use this term only as a joke because it's the only way I won't burst into hysterical tears and blame myself for being a bad mom and her dropping weight like mad. Not meant to offend anyone, yo.

Longest. Update. Ever.

(I warned you...)

The self proclaimed (and probably proclaimed by others, too) worst blogger in the world is giving it one more shot. I've not been able to stick with any other blogs I've started, so why is this one different? Well, truthfully, it probably isn't. Ha! But I've had enough life changes going on that deserve to be remembered and between the lack of sleep and the wine, unless I write them down I won't be able to. Kidding, kidding.

I truthfully had the best of intentions to document my pregnancy in some way but things never settled down enough for that to come to fruition. I enjoy reading about others' pregnancies but I mostly love the idea since it is a way to look back, years later, and remember all the details that time will most likely take away.

As I write this, I've been a mom for five weeks. And there is so much that has gone on in these five weeks alone that I have no idea how I'll remember a thing about the past by the time she's four. So I don't care if anyone ever reads this, I just want to remember this experience and be able to share it with the rest of my family.

Some of these life happenings may get their own post, but knowing how dedicated I am to blogging, they probably won't. This may never even get published, who knows! But let's give it a whirl.

When I last left off, I was sharing my shoe drama with the world. Lots more dramz occurred when planning the wedding but for your sake, I'll spare you. (They were all along the same level of importance as Badgley Mischka-Gate so you're not missing much.)

The wedding went off without a hitch on April 30, 2011...we both showed up (which is always a good start), both said yes (another win), and we both got just intoxicated enough to have a good time but still remain (slightly) classy.


We had an awesome honeymoon...


And then came back to Texas to settle in what was supposed to be a pretty relaxing couple of months before Justin would graduate from Residency and we would move to Clarksville, TN.

Until the end of May, when we found out that this little homegirl wanted to join the party...(Spoiler alert: she isn't born looking like the stegosaurus she resembles in this picture.)

Thankfully we found out our family would be expanding just in time (as in twelve hours before we'd board our flight) for us to adjust our house-hunting plans in our new city. But that ended up not mattering because we didn't find a house anyway.
Our 1st picture after finding out we were going to be PARENTS. Of like, a human.

At the beginning of June, the overachiever of the relationship (read: not me) graduated from the US Army's Pediatrics Residency Program and we surprised our parents with the news that they would be grandparents the same weekend.


At the end of June, we the Army Movers packed up our crap...
and moved it from Texas to Tennessee.

And at the beginning of July, we packed up our cars and made the trip to Tennessee to join our crap. When we pulled into town at 11pm on a Thursday to find that our temporary housing plans had gone down the [rhymes with Twitter], we were forced to shack up in some luxury accommodations while we found a permanent place to reside.


As if getting married and becoming parents didn't make us grown up enough, we decided to buy a house! The first time home buying process, though annoying at times, was made relatively simple thanks to the help of my parents who combined have over, like, 100 years in the real estate industry. (Okay, maybe not 100. More like 90.)
We closed in August. And yes, we've since mowed our lawn.

So after a sometimes tumultous past three years of residency combined with the whirlwind of the past five months, we were ready to relax and get settled in to our new military life. Kinda put life on Auto Pilot for a little bit. Enjoy some peace and quiet and each other before our little one was to join us in the New Year. Sounds pretty good, right?

Enter September 8th.

My husband arrived home from work on that Thursday and had to deliver the heartbreaking news that he was being deployed to Afghanistan. In November. For seven months.

This is not news that any wife would take well. But if you do the math, or look at a calendar, this is news that especially would not be well taken by a pregnant wife. Due in four months.

Once again, the joke was on us and we were put in our place, quickly being reminded that life is going to take the twists and turns it wants and your only job is to hold on tight and not fall off the ride.

This being our first deployment, we had no idea there was so much to do to prepare. Weeklong training courses, daylong training sessions, paperwork, paperwork, paperwork, meetings, meetings, meetings, etc. etc. etc. As if that weren't bad enough, my husband still had to see patients all day on most days and to throw some more salt on the wound, he was set to take his Pediatric Boards in October. But, as I've learned with being a new mom, when things happen and you have to get through them, you just do it. You get through them.

We got everything set for him to leave, he studied his butt off and PASSED(!!) his Boards and we spent as much time together as possible before he left from Fort Benning for his first deployment on November 11, 2011. Veteran's Day, ironically.
Our last picture together as a family of three! (Cut me some slack, it was 4am.)

So, aside from the fun of Christmas and a sober New Year's Eve where I was in bed before the ball dropped, you're caught up on 2011. 2012 has started off to be rather interesting so it's deserving of its own posts. Thus, aside from a hopefully-to-come Pregnancy Post, you're all caught up!

Housekeeping.

So I'm definitely not planning a wedding anymore. And I don't live in Texas anymore. I do, however, still love margaritas.

Need to do some updating to the ol' blog's asthetics.

In due time, my friends.

So...let's get real. I suck at this blogging thing. Don't believe me? Check out my last post back in good ol' September 2010.

But, I'm going to give it one more try. Mainly because I just had a baby and I'm just narcissistic enough to think that people want to read about her all the time. (AND WHY WOULDN'T THEY!?!) I'm also not a huge phone person and this cuts out on telling the same stories over and over again. Still, the select few that would have been in my Sprint Calling Circle back in '95 will get to hear me blab on and on. They're welcome.

I'm going to try to do some kinda "Where Are We Now" update to bring all four of you readers up to speed on what has been going on since I started ignoring this blog like my red-headed stepchild.

Juju

Do you believe in it?

Not this kind of JuJu...
Source

This kind...Source

If my silence hasn't given it away, perhaps you can guess that the whole shoe delivery debacle did not end well. What we thought would be an easy fix turned out to be a massive effort.

The shoes were not at the apartment complex office. So where were they? My mom and I each spent hours on the phone, going back and forth with Endless and UPS and my old apartment complex, trying to figure out the answer to that question. By the end of the day Thursday, I had reached the point where I didn't even care about the shoes anymore. It turns out, the new tenant of our apartment not only had the shoes but she had every intention of keeping them for herself. WTF? When I got the phone call from my old complex saying that the new tenant had finally surrendered the shoes, it's sad but I wasn't really that excited. I was like, "eh, okay." To be honest, the drama had become too much.
Who would've thought that these pretties could bring anything but happiness?!
Source
I was explaining the situation to some girls at work and they flat out told me, "You cannot wear those shoes! Those shoes are cursed! They aren't meant to be!" (They even went into the discussion of the Latin American curse "Ojo" which, very basically, is when you have something someone else wants, and they are a bearer of the Evil Eye, they can curse that item. [Side note: back when I first learned about the Ojo, I was at work and saw a girl with a plate of brownies. I said in my head 'Wow those look good!' and two seconds later...SPLAT! The brownies fell to the ground. It took my co-workers a good week to convince me I didn't have the "Ojo".] Learn more here.

At first I blew it off. How could I not wear the pair of shoes that I had half of San Antonio looking for? But then I really began to think about how much effort it had taken to track them down and how much stress they caused. I then began to hate the shoes. Did I really think they were cursed? No. But do I really want to wear a pair of shoes that are full of negativity on a day that is supposed to be so happy and joyous? No, again.

So I sent them back. I'm still in l-o-v-e with this style but I think I'm going to start fresh and order them from another site. Hopefully *knock on wood* there will be no shipping issues this time and me and Randee can start our relationship off on a better foot. (Pun intended.)

Am I crazy? Any crazy superstitious things go on when planning your wedding?

Delivery FAIL

A recently married friend said it best: "Get ready to have a deep and serious relationship with your postman, UPS guy, and Fedex worker! Towards the end, I would run out there like it was the damn ice cream truck!"

To me, one of the most annoying parts of planning a wedding is the fact that you have to order so much stuff and then wait for it to be delivered. I'm more of an "instant gratification" person (read: I may be a bit spoiled and want what I want, when I want it. Hey, admitting it is the first step, right?).

The little "Track Your Package" link has so much power over me. My Ctrl+R keys are going to be worn out by the time April 30th rolls around, considering how many times I refresh the UPS and FedEx tracking pages. The worst part has to be when you refresh the page and finally see that your package has been delivered...at 10:21am...and you're at work until 5:00! (I may or may not have I know someone who may or may not have used the excuse "I think I left my stove on!" to run home and check out our their Save The Dates. Can you believe some people?)

So yesterday I knew I would have two, possibly three, packages waiting for me when I got home...

- Our Save the Dates (We'll get into how I feel about VistaPrint a little later...)
- Some DELICIOUS shoes to wear on my wedding day!
- A white BCBG dress my mom bought for me for our Engagement Pictures

Thanks to stalking tracking, I knew the first two were to be delivered yesterday. The dress was a crapshoot that I was just hoping would show up. When I got to the top of the stairs, I was greeted by this!Thank you, delivery man, for your inconspicuous placement of my packages.


Beneath the mat? Two packages, score!


My handy sidekick, Lily, investigated the first one.


Inside package #1...Our Save the Dates! And they're FINALLY perfect! Unfortunately, they're not ready for their big debut yet. But soon enough!

Inside package #2...
A stupid Coors Light Cooler I'd forgotten I ordered off Ebay for the Mr.'s birhday.So where were my shoes!?!? (and the better question...who writes "FRAGILE" on a box holding a soft sided cooler?!?!)

I decided to let the missing shoes go for the night since I had my STDs to play with (hehe). But today, the shoes were still not here. So I decided to call up my friendly Endless customer service girl, Amanda.
Source
(So, she isn't actually MY customer service girl, I was randomly assigned to her. And this is what she looks like in my head.)

To make a long story short...Endless made a mistake a left my apartment number off the shipping label. When UPS got to my complex, rather than going into the office to inquire, they thought, "Hey! We have this other address on file for her because she orders shoes and clothes non-stop randomly, let's bring the shoes there even though we have no idea if she lives there!"

What address would that be? My old apartment across town, where someone else now lives. So someone randomly had a pair of Badgley Mischka shoes delivered to them today, for FREE. It was like my dream came true. To some other person.

After speaking with UPS customer service, an alert was sent out for the closest driver to go to my old apartment complex and find.these.shoes. Why were they going to such lengths? Because Endless informed me that this shoe was now out of stock, making these missing shoes the fashion world's equivalent to Saving Private Ryan.A nice Mr. UPS man went to my old apartment, knocked on the door and asked for the package that had been delivered earlier. The new tenant swore no such package had been delivered. So unless the person in my old apartment is a shiesty biotch trying to steal my shoes, they are safely in the apartment office, where I will go tomorrow at the break of dawn to rescue them.

The situation kinda stinks but I'm very impressed with the customer service at both Endless and UPS.

I know there's a song that goes "Two outta three ain't bad." I don't know about that but I do know that "One outta three BLOWS!"

Has your life day ever been ruined by a snafu caused by the postal service?